Locombia 2017 Chapter Three: The Plan
We went through about a third of the world’s country before making a decision. Tempting destinations such as Spain, Italy and North America were disqualified because of the February climate. In the end, Colombia was the preferred option.
Colombia is a horrible place. Don’t go there and stop reading now.
Of course the former statement a blatant lie. Colombia is one of the loveliest places that I know, but if that secret gets out there, I worry it will be flooded with the worst kind of tourists and it will lose some of its charm. Colombians are generous and hospitable. The climate is great. The landscape is fascinating. The atmosphere is awesome. Yet nothing is perfect, and the music can be a torture. I’m of course talking about vallenato, which consists of a middle-aged man screaming (not singing, but screaming) out his pain over some lost love. I have poised myself to endure many many songs of vallenato during the trip, simply because it seems unavoidable.
In addition, Colombians put coriander on most of their food. That is at least the case in the highlands, and also where we are riding, if I recall correctly. You can't really use this against Colombian cuisine anymore, though, since this (bad) habit is becoming more common in Norway, too. I won’t say anything else about Colombian food, because on the issue of national cuisine, Colombians are easily offended. The food is excellent on the Pacific and Caribbean coasts, and we won’t swing by.
We are going to the coffee lands. From Bogotá we will head south and then west, descending and climbing the Andes mountains four times for a total of almost 900 kilometers. The total elevation gain is 20,000 meters. This may not make a lot of sense for many readers, but I can assure you it’s a lot. So we have to head out with an easy load and easy mind. And call a cab if necessary.